I'd Like to Buy a Valve

This is Brian again, making my contribution to the blog as a guest writer. I have a story about Rachel. At times I feel like I am trying to be a good parent by trying to make meaningful conversation with my children. Many time these conversations go something like this:
Me: "So (insert name of child here) how was (insert name of activity here) today?"
Rachel/Erick: "Fine."
Me: "What did you do at (insert previously named activity here)?"
Rachel/Erick: "I forgot."
Me: "Why on earth do I pay for (insert previously named and obviously non-memorable activity here)."
Okay, really I don't say that last line, but sometimes I think it. These heart to heart conversations happen frequently and the kids have started to reciprocate by initiating similar conversations. The other day the children and I had a dialogue that went something like this:
Erick: "So, Dad how (insert one of the many boring things Dad does, this time it's work) today?"
Me: "Fine."
Rachel: "What did you do today?"
Me: "Well, I wrote a memo today about replacing some single offset resilient seated butterfly valves."
At this point in the conversation, you can probably tell that the kids are just eager with anticipation to hear all about the memo. I mean this is extremely enthralling stuff, the stainless steel body, the hard rubber seat inside the valve and the motorized actuator on the valve. Next time there is a seven minute lull at a gathering, just start talking about valves, it's an instant ice breaker and soon everyone will be chatting away. But, again I digress in my musings. Noting the kids intrigue, the conversation continued as follows:
Me: "Do you two know what a valve is?"
Erick: "No."
Rachel: "I do."
Me: "Rachel, will you please explain to Erick what a valve is?"
Rachel: "You know it's letters in the alphabet like A, E, I, O and U."
At this point I had to chuckle and think, "Mr. Sajak, I'd like to buy a vowel."